Tag Archives: cars

Lust after curves. love engineering.

Much like women who are often first admired for their beauty, a car is most often first noticed & lusted after for its swooping sheet metal.

On a personal level: I certainly first noticed my wife as an attractive female.  It was only after getting to know her I fell in love with her engineering & subsequently married her.  Don’t get me wrong, I still think she’s hot, but It’s the supportive, strong and capable aspects of my wife I appreciate when knee deep in a baby induced shit storm or after a really hard day in the salt mines.

Like a woman, Audi made me lust after her during my youth with the muscular fenders and venerable speed of the Quattro coupe, but it was the engineering that drove me to ownership (currently I drive an audi allroad). For me it was the most appropriate & coolest machine within my means that made sense to own (living with a couple kids in a place where weather is volatile like Toronto) A beautiful avant with twin turbos and air suspension, whats not to love.

On a sunny afternoon day the clean lines, purposeful proportions and muscular fenders Urge me to open a cold one, air out the bags, sit back and admire, but it’s behind the wheel I appreciate it for all the beauty that lies beneath. During winter storms I am more gregariously in love with Audi then ever.

The quattro and overall engineering of this machine leaves me firmly planted no matter the weather, four wheel drive commanding authority when traversing snow covered highways, the twin turbos letting me outpace the morons about to slide into me. But its not all german staunchness: when on a side road off comes the ESP stability control and with a quick shift and prodding of the go pedal, on come the turbos & free break the tires, pushing me through icy corners with massive four wheel drift. It really is amazing the control you can maintain while maniacally sliding through snowy streets in an Audi.

So like my wife, I love my car dearly, unlike my wife, I may sadly need another one. If I do need another machine with which to buy diapers, cruise happily, feel good in and enjoy washing it’ll likely be another Audi.

Planes trains ‘n automobiles

Planes trains and automobiles

The Leap Frog bubble wash is crazy! It’s a great toy residing on my refrigerator helping us to distract the small monster while stirring up some fry. It sings catchy songs that get stuck in my head, making me swear while in My car wishing it could fly out of Toronto’s traffic jam.

This thing recognizes when there is the ass of a plane and the nose of a boat on it and sings a song about a “boatplane” The machine thinks the boatplane will not go. This is a logical assessment at first glance (or listen) but if you think outside the box for a second you’ll quickly realize it is gravely mistaken. As almost infinite online resources will prove the bush plane can and WILL go, whether airborne or skimming along in the H2O it’s all good!

I must question then the accuracy of the other claims of this wash n go machine.

A car-plane…


A car-boat… endless examples, a good one… BOOM

A train-car.. well our good friend Jeremy Clarkson over at Top Gear managed to prove that wrong by turning the classic Jaguar XJS into a sport train… BOOM

As this fridge toy has brought me mucho help while making dinner, it pains me that I must find fault with it’s logic, but these are faults. Of course, a firetruck-car does not exist. Maybe we should get on that people, c’maaan. Either way, it’s a great helper on the fridge so thanks Leap Frog.